The Honor Due

I have had the occasion recently to discuss and think about what a friend once termed “end of life issues”. I am not referring to myself or our generation, although some of us are indeed, as Lozanne terms it, “on deck”. Many people of my generation are now trying to sort out the issues that inevitably arise as their parents become elderly. Difficult decisions confront many regarding the independence, health and required care for their aging parents. It can be an agonizing position to be in having to decide the immediate welfare and future of the two persons who nurtured and raised you. We are much more use to deferring to their wisdom with love and respect.

When I think of our own situation, I marvel how Lozanne and I did not have to make any long term decisions regarding the future of our parents. Lozanne’s mother passed away in 1992 when she was 69 years old. Lozanne’s father and both of my parents entered eternity within a six month period in 2005. Both my parents died 34 days apart and Lozanne’s father died five months later. The grief felt with their loss was great, but it has recently become apparent to me that we did not have to make one decision regarding their aging future. All were octogenarians living independently in their own homes when they passed away. Both of our fathers died after short illnesses and my mother passed away very suddenly in her sleep. We never had to consider the prospect of caring for them in our own home and better yet, we never once entered a nursing or retirement home to find them a safer place of care. I thank God for being spared those agonizing decisions. I like to believe that, if required, we would have risen to the occasion and done the right thing. Jesus made it very clear what the right thing was, and indeed is, in Mark 7: 8-13.

8 "For laying aside the commandment of God, you hold the tradition of men––the washing of pitchers and cups, and many other such things you do."

9 He said to them, "All too well you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your tradition.

10 "For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and your mother’; and, ‘He who curses father or mother, let him be put to death.’

11 "But you say, ‘If a man says to his father or mother, "Whatever profit you might have received from me is Corban" ––’(that is, a gift to God),

12 "then you no longer let him do anything for his father or his mother,

13 "making the word of God of no effect through your tradition which you have handed down. And many such things you do."

Jesus is openly and plainly scolding the powerful Pharisees for their propensity to dream up new rules that better suited man, not God. They are man made rules that have no basis in the word of God. One of their practices was, when they became a Pharisee, to ignore the needs of their own parents because they gave that portion of their wealth directly to God. Indeed they are breaking one of the Ten Commandments in order to satisfy their own man made rule. Jesus makes our obligation to honor our mother and our father very clear. We are to look after them when and if they need us. I marvel at how little God required of us to fulfill our responsibilities. I pray that our children will have the same blessing.

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